I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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