If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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