so explain again why im purple
no
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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