Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
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Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
What a dumb baby whore.
I wish there were birth control emojis
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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