And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
