I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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