was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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