He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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