White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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