Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize