Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
sarcasm needs its own font
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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