best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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