Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
