I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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