id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
