It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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