I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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