theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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