i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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