god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
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