My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
