at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
