your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
