If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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