I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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