What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize