She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
