Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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