i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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