I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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