You're my little dorito
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Randomize
