he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
