I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
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Strip Mario-Kart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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