tell your sister to shave her snatch
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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