Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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