Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
