You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
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Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
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Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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