Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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