Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
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