I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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