I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
