I want to have your abortion
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
