quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
