i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
