Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize