how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Randomize
