Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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