If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
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I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
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Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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