I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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