How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
